I don’t want to leave, but what am I supposed to do?

2021.12.06 03:09 Ok_Let_5051 I don’t want to leave, but what am I supposed to do?

I’ve never really posted on Reddit before and I’m so afraid my boyfriend is going to see this somehow (although I don’t even think he has/uses Reddit anymore), please let me know if I need to add any additional information. (However I will eventually take this down.)
I have been with my boyfriend for a year. Within the first month, everything was great and I adored him. Soon, we entered a downward spiral in which he gradually became meaner and meaner. I knew he had preexisting mental health issues, but I never ever imagined it to get this bad.
For some background info, he has some very severe childhood trauma and some sort of underlying mental illness, but he refuses to tell anyone or even tell therapists about what he feels. His mental illness is so horrible that it has impacted his life, behavior, and ability to socialize. When asked about why he doesn’t tell anyone his emotions, he will respond with “I’m just uncomfortable with it.”
When we first started dating, he was really really sweet and we regularly hung out for hours on end. We were both really happy. The next month, he slowly became more distant and I then asked him if anything was going on. He said he was having some issues and just needed space, I understood and didn’t text him unless he texted first. After that, things were okay again, but he started to have unpredictable bouts of pure unfiltered anger and regularly took it out on me. I then noticed a pattern in which I would make a mistake or accidentally annoy him and then he would insult and berate me and then block me. I began to become afraid of him. Everything escalated into demanding for nudes, constant arguments, insults, break up threats, “I’m going to kill myself since you clearly don’t love or care about me” threats, anything he could do to tear into me. The suicide threats were the worst. He would be having a completely unrelated issue, vent to me, and then turn it on me and say everything was my fault or that he wasn’t satisfied with the comfort I’m giving him and that it proves I don’t love him. I cried for hours on end when he randomly stopped responding to me, only for him to text me a few hours later that he was sorry. He was always apologizing, yet never correcting his actions. Another thing he would do is constantly beg me to buy him things, like really expensive tech accessories, and he would get really mad when I said no. He once threatened to kill himself because I would buy him a $60 mouse. He has spent over $400 dollars. He would also minimize my issues and trauma because he believed he “had it worse.” I only stayed with him because I was afraid he was going to hurt himself, hurt me, and I would always blindly believe that there was a chance he really did love me. At certain times, he even manipulated me into apologizing when I didn’t do anything wrong.
All of this abuse made me hate myself, my confidence was ruined. I wrote in my diary and notes app on a regular basis to keep track of everything and so I can vent. One day, my dad was looking around my room and found my diary. He read it and then told my mom. After school, I came home to a confrontation that lasted quite a while. My mom was mad at me for getting abused, not really at my boyfriend for abusing me, but at me because she thought I was being stupid. After this, I texted my boyfriend a very long message about what he did. He was genuinely sorry. He apologized in great deal and explained that he does these things because of his mental illness and his sense of pride, he hates admitting when he’s wrong and just escalates the situation further, but it wasn’t an excuse and he was sorry and would do better. I didn’t accept this apology right away. I gave him an ultimate stating that if he did not correct his behavior entirely, I would break up with him. He agreed and said I was well within my right to do that. Surprisingly, he kept his word. We stopped arguing, no demands or insults, we were a normal couple. It’s been 4 months since we had that discussion. We’ve been perfectly fine until recently, the arguments are starting to happen again. Not flat out abuse, but just a few arguments. It’s making me a little scared. I know arguments are very normal in relationships, but I really don’t know if I should’ve trusted what he said back then.
Did he really change, or am I just being naive?
submitted by Ok_Let_5051 to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]

2021.12.06 03:09 OhioInvadesUSA Add these

A blue human
A purple Barney the Dinosaur
A christmas reindeer
A fluffy goat prince
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2021.12.06 03:08 mxsxc Scared for My Wallet

I applied to 11 universities as a transfer student. About 8 of those universities require supplemental applications for nursing and TEAS transcripts. Just thinking about the extra fees is making me nervous. Send good vibes.
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2021.12.06 03:08 Exact-Cucumber-2156 Eine Handvoll Eule.

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2021.12.06 03:08 OverlookeDEnT Battery 4 - Is there a way to have the files it uses save themselves or attach themselves to a folder?

If I ever bring up the file/song I don't want to have to look for files I want them all self-contained. In Studio One if I use "Impact XT" which is like Battery it auto-saves all the files in a folder. Is this possible with Battery?
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2021.12.06 03:08 Numba1Goon [H] Crimson Avowance of the veiled ones + Golden Full-Bore Bonanza + Eternal Radiance Blade [W] Mace of Aeons

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2021.12.06 03:08 Atlas_simply_cannot Small vent

I think my grandparents (who I live with) are starting to realize I’m trans. They always emphasize that I’m a beautiful girl. It just makes me feel really dysphoric. I don’t have any friends my age and honestly I just need validation and for someone to treat me like a boy and use he/they pronouns for me. That’s all but it feels good to get this off my chest 😌
submitted by Atlas_simply_cannot to trans [link] [comments]

2021.12.06 03:08 disentzf My friends are having a 90’s theme party and asked for Lisa Frank cookies.

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2021.12.06 03:08 Shu-_- "Laissez-moi torcher le cul de vos vieux"

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2021.12.06 03:08 Certain-Garbage3304 Most difficult rank

Just want to make a quick survey about most difficult rank
View Poll
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2021.12.06 03:08 ryadav10 Smart snoring solution

The Nora snoring solution consists of a pad under your pillow linked to a little gadget by your bed. When you start to snore, it gently moves your head to open your airways: no more snoring, and they claim you won’t feel a thing, either.
Nora will set you back $359, but for anyone who shares a bed with a snorer, it’s priceless.
submitted by ryadav10 to IoTStrangest [link] [comments]

2021.12.06 03:08 Weird-Tumbleweed2682 Ukranian gift box

I am making a gift box for a woman I like who lives in Kherson, Ukraine. Sending from Noth Carolina to Ukraine. I am wanting to send a ''sample of America''. UPS quoted $216 for a box up to 10 pounds.
so far, 1 local glassblown necklace
3x local strong flavor infused honey ( blackberry, firecracker, and vanilla )
1x tropical tea sampler and bbq spice mix ( from fresh tea and spice store )
1x thyme brand, christmas frasier fir blend candle ( she likes christmas tree smell )
1x lotion sampler thing ( only 9.99 from candle website )
1x wool hat, made from authentic icelandic wool
1x old trapper beef jerky, and other small American snacks.
Help me fill the gift box ! I'm not sure as to what products, what quality, and at what cost are available in that part of Ukraine.
I am buying for a women, 29yr, speaks\teaches English ( not fluent, but passable ) educated, she is excited to get a gift box and one coming from USA !
submitted by Weird-Tumbleweed2682 to ukraine [link] [comments]

2021.12.06 03:08 Instagrammeme12 [Selling] 110k quote page that’s super active. 8k+ average. 11k+ mostly

I’m new to reddit itself, I use to use sites like epicnpc and playerup but for now taking offers. Nothing under 500$
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2021.12.06 03:08 IAmTheTrueM3M3L0rD (Serious) People who are against transgenders or the LGBTQ+ spectrum, Why?

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2021.12.06 03:08 NAUSEATINGLY_CUTE What's worst first contact text message?

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2021.12.06 03:08 majorslipa majorslipa - dayz = Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!

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2021.12.06 03:08 JadeAnnByrne Esports players during photo shoots

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2021.12.06 03:08 ultraShortstack I did a lil thing as a reaction image for my gc

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2021.12.06 03:08 modistksz Visiting a Friend by me (poqu)

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2021.12.06 03:08 Packerina Nice to see Dwayne Wade pursuing his other dreams besides basketball

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2021.12.06 03:08 rootsnblueslover Chicken Sun Dried Tomato Pesto Primavera (no photo, sorry).

I used to make this a long time ago and just thought of it again, so I made it last night. I made a lot of it, because we like leftovers. The recipe below would be a single batch, approx. 4 servings.

2 T. olive oil (any neutral oil will work, olive just adds a tad of flavor)
1.5 lbs. chicken, any part chopped into approx. 1" or so pieces (I used boneless, skinless thighs)
1 small zucchini, chopped into half moons (or half of a regular sized one)
1 small yellow squash, chopped into half moons (or half of a regular sized one)
1 small - medium crown of broccoli, broken into florets
.5 lb of asparagus, cut into approx 2" pieces (it was on sale very cheap)
.5 lb. angel hair pasta
1 jar Mezzetta Sun Ripened Tomato Pesto (not expensive at all)
Salt, pepper, garlic powder or granulated garlic

Put water on to boil for the pasta.
Prepare all of the vegetables.
Add the oil to a skillet and brown the chicken in the skillet with the salt, pepper and garlic.
When browned, add all the veg, hold back on the yellow squash until the rest are about half done.
Saute until all veg are done and add the cooked pasta and tomato pesto sauce.
Combine all ingredients well and serve. Add grated cheese, if you like, but not terribly necessary, or some red pepper flakes to spice it up a little.
Notes: can add mushrooms, carrots, or any other veg you like. I wanted sugar snap peas, but they were out.
The reason I didn't take a photo is because it's not a terribly photogenic looking dish. It looks good and tastes wonderful, but doesn't really visually translate well for photos.
submitted by rootsnblueslover to budgetfood [link] [comments]

2021.12.06 03:08 NoConflict7553 #Newzealand ,,Holy Quran, Surah Al Furqan 25:58, Allah/God Kabir only is eternal in reality. - Baakhabar Sant Rampal Ji Maharaj

#Newzealand ,,Holy Quran, Surah Al Furqan 25:58, Allah/God Kabir only is eternal in reality. - Baakhabar Sant Rampal Ji Maharaj submitted by NoConflict7553 to SaintRampalJi [link] [comments]

2021.12.06 03:08 atory1990 Sugar mommy or daddy? NO SCAMS PLEASE

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2021.12.06 03:08 Cash-L I created a meme sub for NVLDers / people with Nonverbal learning disability.

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